Encouragement....

24 February 2020 12.33noon

It had been a rough month of January, with demise of my beloved aunt, my tension in the family, fingers and foot pain, emotional ups and downs, mom's cry for me to be back home...etc....but somehow....I know God will always bring me through. Compared with last year...I guess I am better in holding my emotions now....at least I dont cry in front of my students as often as last year...haha...super mensia suikan...

This encouragement below is from someone I barely know....but it speaks so much to me....Lord, I know many times I had failed you....but You remain faithful....I know You are going to help me through....Thank you Jesus...You know my heart desire most....and I commit myself into Your hand...lead me, guide me...keep me strong by Your side, Abba....

" If the burden of discipleship within you is so strong, don't let anything stop you. Each person is given a certain measure of His Spirit to do what is intended. Perhaps you have a different Spirit, the right Spirit for the right time and place. I don't think God minds the gender. Maybe a Tai Kar Cher figure is what they need. When God's Spirit is upon you, flow with it. You'll then find favor in the sight of God and man (Lk 2:52).

When the girls share their problems, sometimes it's good to just be listeners and pray with them. Sometimes, no words is a good option too. At least you pray for them. As you go along, the experience will help and you'll gain further wisdom. You'll become wiser and able to counsel better. It'll be better than learning the theories of counseling. This is real life and the Spirit that searches all things, even the deep things of God will be your Greatest Helper and Revealer (1 Cor 2:9-12). Counseling and discipling the young ones is an enriching ministry if it is done in total dependance with the Spirit of God. Mother Theresa didn't start as a professional. She was as green as you. But she turned up to be a great figure. I see potential in every person. You can be the Mother Celina for your students! "

Something that I want to remind myself every year....sent from someone i barely know....and how God is always so so faithful and timely....

21 January 2020

Its a new year, and I'd entered this new year with much challenges....the most significant was my pain on my foot, thumb and finger. I thought I could endure the pain quite well, but it had came to a level where I cannot endure anymore. Feeling quite frustrated with the "handicapp" i had. I havent been touching any work in the hostel, I know it do me good, but still...so much to be done....expecting the students to do it means I have to lower down my expectation so much.

Yesterday, my heart just ache...for the things happening in the hostel, for the things spoken with my sis and my own emotion and feeling really got me down...oh Lord....there are many deepest things that only You understand. Help me run this race with perseverance. There are times I just wish I can go home....there are times I felt I will be..earlier than anyone would guess....but is it just what I want or is it sth that is going to happen? I do not want to die with pain, but I want to leave this world leading many people to Christ. Perhaps I have the blood of martyr in me? Well well...life is really difficult la...more so when I am always been alone in the journey with God...I know no one is permanent in life....but at least there is more than just this....Lord, please help me to align my thinking to You...I need you...really need you...