22 June 2015 Sabah to Penang

Today is 71 days I am in Sabah. Thankful for the great time I have here serving the Lord, not by might, not by power but by His Spirit. Indeed it is definitely not my own strength that I am able to go through this, God really enables.

Last 3 days we really have good time at village, and I am very very very sure God really hold the weather for us coz it was raining everyday prior to us coming, really see the hand of God throughout the journey. 

For me this mission trip was quite a relax one as I do not hold big responsibilities, and I really enjoy the fellowship among the believers, I have come to know a group of like-minded friends who just have so much passion serving God. Am really really encouraged to see their faithfulness in the Lord. 

Look forward to go home and spend time w mom, pray she will really see Gods hand in the life of her daughter that she would praise this God of wonders...

I really love kids...haha...more pics at my camera...hope to post it when I'm back home :)

My fav..yum yum

Amazing Race, Amazing Grace

Well well....this morning chatted with a long long time friend...and he was suggesting that I should do sth with my blog, make it a blockbuster (not his exact words)..lol....and his last words for me...amazing race, amazing grace...yea..I thought that was good, so now I change it to Amazing Race (Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. - Hebrew 12:1-3 - ), Amazing Grace (For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - Eph 2:8). Amazing how God bring across my path and gives me ideas...haha...u know who you are :P Thanks..I have added some Bible verse on it...so you would understand where do I come from....and why your suggestion sound interesting to me :P

Today not having much to do, just hang around while Rumba is having meeting with leaders. Pray all be well. I really salute her for her energy and tenacity in dealing with so many peoples from different walk of life...many times I guess we would be looking at someone and stand in awe of the things he/she does, but ultimately if we look back to the source of it...it is the Lord Almighty that is at work. Without Him, dying on the cross for us, we would not have know His love for us, and we would not be His disciples to love others as well...so ultimately it is still God...

His mercies are new every morning

Kasih TUHAN abadi dan rahmat-Nya tidak berkesudahan; selalu baru setiap pagi, sesungguhnya Dia setia! (RATAPAN 3:22-23 BM)

Praise God for another day, been a great day yesterday even though I felt super duper tired. Woke up 530am and then waited for ketua sidang to pick me and drop me at kemabong area to go back to KK. Dropped by Keningau and we clean up the kindy to 11plus night and then rested 12 plus...my mind seems to be not adjusting well to the sleeping time coz normally by 8pm I would be on my bed..so head abit heavy liao...praise God, despite that my heart is still very at peace, knowing God is in control. 

Hoping to be back to KK soon coz many errand to run...thursday would have another mission trip and I hope I can sempat wash and dry my baju tomorrow and sun will shine so my baju will dry..

Am very thankful for His faithfulness in my life, amazing that I had spent 45days at the village without electricity...indeed it

Is the Lord! God have been really really good to me! 

The Ibu's that I teach, they came and send me off...guess surely they gonna miss my lesson. Pray they would do their own revision and read...most important is that they will take note of my sharing and read the bible as often as they can.

Wefie in the dark, last night, these kids were with me, nana and carliana...may the Lord bless them with wisdom in their studies :)

Oh and that's me before and after...haha...abit tan liao...and I believe healthier too...

My first meal after came down from village...at kemabong...and manage to makan a lot chili too...

My unfinished dinner - Loh Mee...nice and I also have taste of my fav tomyam from the team food..haha..God is good :)

Mozzie bite...not at village, but town itself...thank God at village it's not so bad :) in everything give thanks 

And the super lebat mango tree. Now seems like durian season at pg liao, can't wait to go back and makan lulian...haha!

Most important is seeing nieces and nephews and family members, really miss them to the max! Boy I really love kids...Lord, lead me Lord, in whatever I am doing, let it always be birth from you and not my own flesh and blood. Thank You that You have been so so good to me 😢😢 each moment of my life is from You! 

Last day before heading north

Last day with the villagers before I head down to KK..suppose to have sharing with the Ibu's but I don't see them appear in church, so I guess no more sharing...and it's correct..haha...really flexible as ever..

Yesterday we had special service for giving of tithes, the villagers suppose to bring tenth of their crops to church, and then we have makan again, each time there are makan I would be served so well, and these are the foods that they given to me...after service makan lagi and I was served coffee, and with lots of kuih and rice to bring back home. 

Feel so paiseh coz I'm alone, where can finish so much...anyway I took it too, and today whole day that's my meal. Won't have to cook anymore, can just have my soup with the kuih...and tomorrow morning I'll travel back, Lord, give me a renewed vision when I come back here in July. Thank you Jesus!

Sunday school lesson, what is heaven like? Today it's raining, thank God coz ystd was the persepuluhan, so there are shelter outside the church, then we don't have to go under the rain, coz there are shade around.

Kids are here with me again...okie, it's enough for now, been raining frequently recently, please pray for good weather tomorrow and also on 18-22 where I'll join another team to kota marudu for another mission...pray all be well, esp recently the earthquake bell ringing...

Last good meal

Hihi, got vege from the villagers again, though Monday i will be going back to KK..God is really good. 

When i wasn't feeling well and nobody knows about it also, the villager gave me chicken ready cooked, so I can rest from cooking, oh how awesome is our God :)

13 June 2015 11am

I couldn't sleep ystd night, woke up at 230am, and my heart just felt such a heavy burden, I was very tired, but I just couldn't sleep, my mind think of many many things, so I woke up half asleep half awake, and start praying for friends that I remember, and God drop a verse for a sister, so I type the msg for her this morning and then now at sch sending it, then I heard of 2nd quake at Ranau which is 5.1 😪 sigh....

I am thinking to myself, should I be more sensitive to the leading of Holy Spirit, I would prayed the accurate prayer but I just couldn't be bothered by it and not waiting upon the Lord to pray the prayer that He wanted probably...

This morning I recalled back my KK hike last year and said a prayer for Nordin, my mountain guide, Lord, bless him as many of them would lost their income...

This few days somehow heart is quite troubled! Lord, really need your intervention! One area of my life that I really need divine intervention, please guide me! 

Will be sharing with Ibu again tomorrow, my last sharing before I go back home, Lord, direct me! As I prepared this morning, again the unworthy me, kept receiving from Him, and preparing Gods message isn't that difficult, just that I pray it's not of my own flesh but His message dropped into my spirit. I hope there won't be any changes to the message like last week, kinda scary coz dunno it's flesh or spirit...Lord give me the discernment.

It would be exactly one and half month since I had stay put at this village, so much God have brought me through, well, I survived :) and I really have tasted of His goodness once again! 

Lord, let your words be a light unto my path and a lamp unto my feet ! 

Pictures again - delayed post

This is how I steam fish with the little stuff that I have, everything is plastic here..so have to make do with what I have, survival..don't know what fish is that but taste abit weird to me...

Then I fried it to see how it taste

Ermmm..disastrous...lol, so lembik one! 

Brinjal and timun, my 2 most rare vege that I will eat back home, now turn to be the most frequent vege that I consume apart from the organic vege on streams...

My Sunday school kids, self appointed teacher too..sometimes just hard to get their attention...but even if one listen it's more than enough

Uno in progress

Reflection after I shared to the Ibu's on Sunday...

Lord, lead me further...

10th June 2015

Prayed for the family of the victim of KK climb yesterday and shared with them about life in Christ..how fragile life is and we have to keep praying for the nation. At times I wonder whether they understand me..nevertheless I pray Holy Spirit will quicken their heart. I can only do this much while I'm here coz I don't think I'm going to be here for rest of my life..

Recalled back my climb a year ago...still could remember so well how the guide held my hand and walk with me, encourage me, trying to make me mad so I have more energy to climb...the joke he make...and the kampung Adidas that I have always been wearing, and the socks that I bought specially for the climb, it really reminds me so much of the climb a year ago, and if I was there now, how would the feeling be 😥 

God comfort those who mourn. Really felt for those victim family, something that is fun and adventerous have turned to be disaster 😪😪

This 2 days I wasn't feeling well, but have not stop my teaching. At times just feel so strengthless, but He have made me strong. Been so long haven't have migraine and fever, yesterday it all came together. I guess probably my heart is looking forward to go back to KK and Penang, so battery almost low already. I wanna have my own time together, but kids kept coming to me, esp when I showed them the UNO card, every now and then when they are bored, my place is one of their play station too.

That's just a part of the trick to lure them to study also, have to keep finding sth interesting to attract them to study, like I'm forcing them to ulangkaji, well, if that help, why not...sometimes I would have the mentality of not giving best coz I feel I can't help much, but guess I have to kept confessing that they will learn and I pray for patience, coz this 2 days, I have not been having much patience coz there I was not feeling well, had the painful head, yet they are not listening when I teach...so I got abit agitated...forgive me Lord !

My food supply also supposedly had finished, somehow God sent ppl just to bring me fish, vege, so I guess my food supply is just ngam ngam to the day I go down. This few days are very cold and I haven't been sleeping well coz the noise kids made at night. Ystd night I really Beh tahan, at 645pm I tot nobody came and I would have my own time alone to sleep, manatau they still came despite rain, simply coz Uni, so I sternly told them I am sick and please don't make too much noise, and surprisingly they were so quiet, praise God..despite all the inconvenient, He is still the all knowing God.

Please continue to pray I'll be strengthen and having the full joy of the Lord serving here..

It's really not easy, esp that i seems to be doing things of my own, coz I am not under any church or organization, nobody really needed anything or request anything from me, I'm pretty free to do what I feel appropriate here, I just pray that God will direct my path. Sometimes I got weary, and feeling of giving up and not to come back, but somehow I felt it's not over yet, so I pray God will strengthen me, let His will be done! 

Will be going home soon, I guess I'm thinking too much, am afraid to come back here after half a month coz dunno the place will be full of cockroaches and spiders not...oh me of little faith! Celina, U must grow, to be and have childlike faith !!!

Random

Some crazy pics I did at night when I'm alone :) just for entertainment

Today had 3 hours teaching and there is one new joiner...she's non believer, I only know after she paid and given her the book..and I was struggling in my heart to take or not take 😪 in the end by faith la, so I decided to write a letter and she sign after I read and make sure she understood it! God help me! 

Got fresh fish to fry later, yay! This few days been eating good, praise God for His faithfulness :)

7 June 2015 God You are amazing

7 June 2015 - After church service

Sent msg of thanks to friends who prayed offline, not able to send out yet coz abit lazy to walk to sch and also am waiting for Ibu to come and see the songs they gonna sing for Sentral. 

Thanks for praying, God really moved, I felt very burden this morning when reach church, during p&w, just felt God want me to share on power of speaking in tongues when I had prepared another message...scary..coz I dunno what to say about tongues, it's quite a deep message, so i search bible, and when flip I just found the scripture, I asked the Lord to confirm, then they sang the song Roh Kudus Kau hadir di sini, and I just feel in my heart it's the Lord message..so I just read from scripture at 1 Cor 14 and try my best to explain..and share what I know, then share what I prepared also, kiasu...lol..afterall I already had prepared..after dat I prayed for all the Ibu, and I was trembling before Him coz He just gave me words to speak and my BM boleh pakai also, really, the power of God is so evident that the Ibu wept and I really believe it's work of God...it's so overwhelming...sometimes I just felt so unworthy...who am I Lord, yet, it's all about Him, not me. I have heavy burden for this daughter, her name is Carnita, she's 5 years yet can't control her bowel. Each time she would just berak when she feels like, not able to control and say it out in words. My heart felt so burden to pray for her, so I held her mom today, Salap, and I prayed, percaya untuk penyembuhan Carnita, segala adalah mungkin bagi Tuhan Yesus. Oh that the Lord will really showed her this miracle...it has been really a journey, and I'm really so thankful for His works in my life..moving forward, would I be a full time missionary? Well, don't know, let His will be done.

My heart so easily feel burden, at times it felt like a thorn in flesh, that I don't know whether it's the Lord speaking or its sth I need to press through and pray...it's really a lot of learnings but I learn to trust Him, to leave the burden to Him and He will give me rest...

One more week I'll go down to KK, seems like a mixed feeling...so much to share yet it's quite impossible to share everything, there are many things that's so dear to me, I pray that God will continue to mould me and make me, to be a vessel of His intention !

Mandi sungai

Today finally had chance to go to the sungai and mandi w them :) 

Have good time with the kids and youth since now is sch holiday and some of them are back from hostel to the house..the youth are catholic girl, too bad she din come this morning for my sharing, the catholic here seems to be abit reserve esp when involve 2 denomination, they just refuse to go to sib church no matter what, haizzz..anyway it's ok, I can still reach out to her personally through our casual chat. 

Some snap shot, feel really bless to have these kids with me :)

6 June 2015 11.56am

6 June 2015 11.56am

Just finished my sharing w PMM and back home to rest. It had been quite a hectic week for me, due to changes in schedule...each time I went online is to catch up on mission trips arrangement and also on planning of trip to sibu for a seminar, yet time seems to be quite tight though it seems like I should be having a lot time here. 

Been a month plus here, yet it just seems like yesterday. Reading my blogs here, seems things are rosy and sweet and I'm really having time of my life here, but of course I have my down time too, esp missing home and also my loves one, and the food 😅 not really a very particular food person but I'm cautious of my nutrient here, there are times I would feel weak, not sure it's psychology or it's really lack of food nutrient, esp I'm also doing my 40 days fast praying for the nation. Don't know what's going on to the nation now coz have not follow news for some time..but just felt the urge to follow through the fast coz the last round it was more of personal needs, this time I should be focusing myself as watchman for nation, esp I'm high up the mountain. 

Come back to the downs...not really that down but most of the times its when the power and wonder workings of His is so evident in my life...when I felt the passion to teach go low, God would somehow reignite that. When I saw how keen the Ibu wanna learn of Gods word, I felt so honored that God chose me for this work..and when I see them smiling at my class, my heart would be leaping w joy. 

My itinerary now is 7am- 10am every Tues n Thurs for adult express class and 8am-10am every Mon, Wed and Friday for slower one. At noontime, normally its 2-4pm for children tuition, monday & thurs - Std 6, tues- std 3&4, wed- std 1,2,5 and Friday is bible story time. Most of the time they came as and when they think it's time coz no watch, so normally I'll end up teaching 2.30pm to 5pm or more. So after that I'll go school to online and charge my phone or laptop and hang there till the sun came down.

I guess Gods work is so evident here coz I really depended on Him a lot. Many times, when I needed space of my own, the kids would not come to stay w me, and out of nowhere, when they are here, even though I feel inconvenient, I would still have activity with them and ideas just came. It's just like my time here is practically for them, so far I have not say no to them :) but God knows all my timings. This whole week I had been sleeping early coz woke up early. I did not have the luxury to wake up late coz need to teach, so at times I missed my quiet time, after long day, when all settled, I would be reading and praying in the dark w little lamp...though at times don't feel like it, I know I have to, coz sometimes I just feel the oppression is so strong, there are times when I'm so down that I do things by obligation, for the reason that I have to do it coz I am here, but God always turn it for good. That I would see myself growing in Him, seeing his power so evident in me, not of my own self but Him.

Even this few days while I was preparing sharing w youth and Ibu, my mind is really blank, somehow when I started to still my heart, ideas just came, even this morning, I believe many people are praying for me, I started dunno what to do coz it's only 5 youth, and all on stage, so I was the only audience, nevertheless, I kept confessing in my heart that it's not me, but all of God. And then when the time for me to share, i startled abit, where should I start, coz what I prepared was just ayat alkitab and Nic video, but somehow...ideas...kehidupan- what is kehidupan to them? I really believe with all my heart that it is God. And somehow we just flow..and it's not boring and they listened and response attentively...i do not know how much it really got into their mind but I believed I'd encouraged them much..and I pray God would stir in their heart to do something...

Throughout my stay here, if there is one thing to learn, it is the quietness and stillness in the Lord. Despite the quietness in village, I can still be busied over many things, esp clean up the house..now I really try to surrender and give it to the Lord. There are holes everywhere, so it's practically impossible to keep the place clean...so I ended up just sweeping only when it's dirty. I realized, I'm really such a Martha...work work and work...even cooking would took me quite a long time and to clean up, by time done I have to rush for kids tuition...and da da da...so now I have to tell myself, hold it hold it....what does the Lord requires U to do...quietness in Him, so now am trying...hihi, trying to spend more time...and my spiritual food every now and then are my podcast from phone and also sermons which are on my laptop. 

I'm really thankful, for friends who really cares and keep me in prayer, I believe you know who you are when you read this...for friends that prayed, thank you so much, it really mean so much to me. I know I'm here well because u guys are committed to pray for me...

Will be going back to KK and join another mission team to kota marudu in a week time...Lord, help me to keep the house clean, so when I come back I don't have to sweat once more time to do all the house cleaning 😅 

Thank You Jesus, you have always been the source of my strength and shield. Lead me Lord to place you want me to go, let me be Your intention...

Earthquake

Just a quick note to say I am fine here, I do feel abit tremor but nothing happen here, thanks for all ur concern :) recently have not enough time to blog :) will post updates soon..thanks for concern and God bless ya

31st May 2015

Today marks a full month I am at Kampung Kapulu. Am ever so grateful for all the valuable experiences here. Indeed the best place to be is the center of Gods will. 

Ystd night I had a terrible nightmare, woke up crying before the Lord. My heart just felt such sense of heaviness that I felt I needed someone to talk to...but who? Well, when internet access is so inaccessible, God is the source of help. I cried out to the Lord to show my why..well, in the end I still don't understand but I kept myself focus and prepare the message that I'm going to share in church, in case suddenly they requested so...I shifted my mind back to what I wanted to share and put it into points in BM...and felt such relieved once I'm done, then I have my sunday sch ready too coz I am teaching them every week..well, true enough today I was requested to preach...since I'm ready I told the leaders im ok, but just sharing and not preaching per say...

So there I was...sharing life story and how I ended up here with them, and halfway through I just wept...just can't control my emotion when I mentioned of goodness of God to my life, throughout my stay here..I was often asked this question, "Siapa kawan cikgu?", and at times I just felt they are so pitiful of me..but through it all...God have never a moment left me...He has always be with me, even though I'm here alone, but I always feel the warmth of His embrace. Felt so paiseh that I make them cry too...

And I just felt God have given me such a timely message, that yesterday suddenly I ended up at 100days commemoration of an elderly who passed away. And I witnessed the ceremony in Murut way. Not a Christian event but a Muslim one, anyway, this morning suddenly just remembered message by Ps Marcus, the legacy of a man that passed away...so I actually shared on Jesus last word to us at Matt 28:19-20, the great commission. I pray that the people understand the heartbeat of God and not to remain complacent..

Have I not obeyed the voice of God but following my heart, I would ended up at school watsapping friends to chit chat..and the message won't come true and I would not be so prepared to share. I realize one thing, I have to really surrender and let God in...not just with mouth, but really with all I am...

I came back from church and I started to work on message for the youth. Am really so excited that I forgotten to cook, until a Ibu came and pass me curry chicken and asked me whether have I cooked? I'm so blessed, just few days ago I prayed for meat, haha...well, coz there is no electricity here and transportation is very inconvenience, therefore my source of meat is just sardine, and earlier on when I just arrived there are wild boar given by the villagers, somehow it had been quite sometime since I last ate any meat, so sort of crave for it...a friend encouraged me to pray and God will answer, wow, amazingly He supplies...the teacher had their last day at sch before the holiday break celebrating birthday for the kids, so happen I passed by sch and was fed kambing and chicken wing and satay...and in my heart I am thanking the Lord for answering my prayer...and this is not the first time He answer...many times, when I felt like I wanna eat sth, He always provides, and today I had my curry chicken, PTL!!! 

You may think I'm so pathetic here, but totally no! I see the providence of God each day, day by day He strengthen me..always giving me new ideas to teach and interact w kids..but guess on adult part, I need to make it more interesting...

Oh ya, suddenly I had this idea of letting the youth do chicken farming to get eggs. Felt the ppl here are quite deprived nutritionally..not sure it's of the Lord...so you who are reading this, please keep me in prayer, I have no idea how to go about it, pray for wisdom of God and confirmation that it's of the Lord, then I can carry it out confidently...

If u have any idea to contribute, do let me know too :)

Been few days did not blog, am slowly finding time to read His words and be connected to Him rather than with my phone :) im really thankful for friends who support me in prayer and friends who gave...I really really see the hand of God in what I'm doing here, despite the anxiousness at the beginning coz doesn't know what's there for me and what to expect..am looking forward to go down KK in 2 weeks time and have good fellowship w the KL team and then back home, and then coming back here again with much more preparation now :) praise Him for all the things that He is doing and going to do...am really looking forward :) 

Such a beautiful cloud 

Another side of the view :)

Starting tuition w kids, cum fun time having craft-time with them :) their attention span is quite short, thank God, with the limited time I had, I managed to googled some origami and games and stories to ensure the kids are learning sth everyday :)

These are the teachers of SK Kg Kapulu...only 27 students in whole sch but they have 12 teachers and a HM..pray that they would teach with genuine interest for the children here :)