Finally have some time to rest coz din cook much today, just steam and goreng fish, plenty of food today, 3 chicken wings, 4 buns, 8 fishes, 2 avocados, wow I am super blessed. So bless coz all are my favorite, esp avocado, it's so expensive over at town, but here I can have it anytime, the villagers have their own plant...God is really good. I know I can't have everything so perfect but where God place me really is perfect in His plans for me. Here although water is issue, but I have plenty of food and won't be lacking in nutrients, unlike kapulu. If I had the same food as I had at kapulu I think my body won't last coz the water really not clean here...though I'm feeding on mineral water now, when I make drink and mandi I am still using the tangki water, and I think my body won't take it...I guess my body is really tough and tahan-ing now...coz every night I could feel that my throat is so dry and sore, but each morning when I wanna teach it's ok...so it's really very not natural that my body able to take it, it must be divine....If only the water here is good and got line here, I really won't mind staying long, haha...but what does the Lord actually say? The ppl here are quite self sufficient, I am not doing much here too, for the literacy class, it's really tough but anyway I know ultimately not me but God....
Ystd we had prayer at every house in the village, due to a word of knowledge given by a villager...and I also joined and asked to Amin-kan doa 2 times, really need to be ever ready here, quite a challenge for a BM like mine...anyway at least the villagers really have heart to pray, for whatever reason it is...fear or really wanna obey the word of knowledge. Not sure what the lady had spoken to the church so far, but she seems to be like a lady prophet to the church...Today Murina said to me that that night really the boy had manifestation and after prayer he became calm, well, I don't want to comment further but just commit to God and ask the Lord to forgive me if I had passed judgement and grieve the spirit. I'm not sure have I sinned, the bible said if we blaspheme against spirit it's unforgiven sin, but what does it really mean? Am still pondering on it...
Countdown, 6 more days, Lord I pray everything will go well, not sure how am I gonna pack my stuff and go Tenom alone..Lord help me...You have always proven faithful to me, so am just trusting You la...
It's very very windy now, wind is so so strong, wonder elsewhere is there anything happening? Any more quake? How is political situation at malaysia now? Would Najib step down? How is mom? sis? Joel and Jared? Joseph? The 3 J's in my life...how about brother and Michelle and Merlyn? Last msg mom sent me was that Merlyn and Michelle slept over in the evening at mom house and mom says Merlyn is cute...how I miss all of them....shouldn't I reach out to my own family first? If I would to decide to stay put at Sabah, how would my relative see me? Leaving mom and serve God? Is that good testimony? Lord, You know best what's in my life, I surrender all to You.
Just had my dinner, can't help but broke down at dinner table, this past one week, my days are all full and occupied, and I have not felt tired or worn out instead have the joy of the Lord. As I had my meal, I'm so thankful despite all, and I'm really happy to be able to teach the kids, sing with them and pray with them. From morning prayer with Ibus before class, then immediately after class primary Sch kids will come to me for revision and I'll be cooking my lunch sambil teach, till 1-2pm...then have a it rest, 3pm resume class till 5pm. Today is most pack coz after that I had bible class with kids, and then followed by revision again. Those kids from Kemabong is back, and can see the difference in their standard of studies compared kids at kampung sch...such huge difference, is it merely teachers or really parent does matter? Hmm...Lord, help the kids in this village..
Life at village really simple...and I'm asking myself why do I tend to complicate things? Why I could be so self giving to other but to my closest am not careful with my words...I just feel I am giving my all to the ministry, without return but why am I expecting from my other half so much? If only I could just release and go with the flow, the only reasoning is that I'm not permanent here...if I am, will I get bored and lost focus and thinking to escape as well? Well, these are the questions I need to find out...long term...how long? Lord...only You know....
Even as I lay to sleep tonight, Daddy, speak to me...that I will be like Samuel, when you call, I'll say speak Lord for your servant hears....
Now waiting for the young gals to come and I'll have bible study with them, still thinking what to share, guess listening to God would be the topic, based on Rick Warren sermon, translated into English, would also love to hear from villagers how they hear from God...would be more of sharings than preaching la...pray God will lead us :)
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