Today I searched through my old journal to find the paper which I wrote in year 1992 when I first accepted the Lord many many years ago, to find it had faded...the date when I first made commitment to the Lord that I will serve Him with all my heart, with all my strength and all my might. On Saturday night when we were having campfire at camp, God just reminded me...24 years ago, you made this commitment, u threw the branch, signifying I am the branches that God will use to serve Him...after 24 good years, here am I, serving Him in full capacity. It's really not easy, many heart issues to deal with, but I know God will bring me through, read some of the journals I had written and most of it are of I'm climbing and never seems to reach destination, flowers that is yet to bloom, etc...as I look back, yea...it would take many many years as Abba is not done with me yet. Sometimes I asked God to take away burden so strong for the lost souls, but it remained so strong still, sometimes it's just too hard to bear, but when I looked to the cross, Christ even bore much more...
As I think back the tears I shed for the needs of the ministry, it's really worth it all, seeing the growth, seeing life touched and changed, seeing God ministered to individual life, I just can't stop my tears of joy and thank the Lord for all He have been to me. It has been a tough decision, yet through it all it is worth it all.
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