18.1.17

After 10 months working, I had my first MC besides when I was hospitalized. Same old thing again, head pain. Lord, when is this thorn in my flesh will be removed? I wanted to do so much things but I am restricted with my health. Are you asking me to take rest again and step down in ministry? How to slow down the pace? I don't know Lord, I just couldn't fold my arm and do nothing. Are you saying that I should just pray and see thing fall into places? I don't know Lord...You knew my heart wanted to reach out to so many ppl, I wanted to share if Your goodness and faithfulness but I'm stumbled in this pain. My mom relate the pain to ministry, everyone think I'm stress..worst still Doctor think I am having depression that I have to be on anti depressants. What is it Lord? Am I not happy with life? Am I not living a fulfilling life? Or was it some stronghold in life that I need to deal with? Haizzzz...really feel I'm not living a testimony. Perhaps I put too much expectation on myself....Lord, help me. No one can understand me except you..and I'll continue to trust in You Lord. Teach me Abba...